English Jokes

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr]girl was yelling in the Church after the Chapel:
Oh God! Please make Moscow the Capital of China!
The priest inquired: Why must you pray so, my child?
Girl: That's what I have written in my answer sheet in the examination![/ltr]

 

[Pegi]

پاسخ : English Jokes

COOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!NICE JOKES!!

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

COOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!NICE JOKES!!

[ltr]Thanks! glad u enjoyed 'em![/ltr]

 

[Narcissus]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr]FUNNY POEM:

One fine morning in the middle of the night.
Two dead boys woke up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other.
Took out their swords & shot each other.
One deaf policeman heard the noise
& killed the two dead boys.
Believe this lie, its really true
Ask the blind beggar, he saw it 2![/ltr]

It's nice​

 

[جیران]

پاسخ : English Jokes

oh
first hi
all of this joks was very good ad funny tnx
and its a good motion
i'm sure all of the members like it
​

 

[جیران]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr]Man: Is there any way for long life?

Dr: Get married.

Man: Will it help?

Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.[/ltr]

[ltr] A boy goes to see a dance.
His mom angrily asks him:
Did u see anything there that u were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes, I saw dad![/ltr]

they were very good [/left
ehsan... heh (were) ]​

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

oh
first hi
all of this joks was very good ad funny tnx
and its a good motion
i'm sure all of the members like it
​

[ltr]hey, what's up?
thanx, that is soooo thoughtful of u to say that! i'm really glad u liked 'em! thanx again!!! x[/ltr]

 

[جیران]

پاسخ : English Jokes

(husband & Wife )
husband: Will U marry , after I die.
Wife : No I will live with my sister.

Wife : Will U marry , after I die.
husband: No I will also live with your sister






The child comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks,What did you learn today?

The kid replies, Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

(husband & Wife )
husband: Will U marry , after I die.
Wife : No I will live with my sister.

Wife : Will U marry , after I die.
husband: No I will also live with your sister






The child comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks,What did you learn today?

The kid replies, Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow

Hmm Funny! I really liked 'em! + x

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr]Husband asks, Do u know the meaning of WIFE. It means...
Without Information Fighting Everytime!

WIFE on hearing this says, it could also mean-
With Idiot For Ever.[/ltr]

 

[mehrdadb]

پاسخ : English Jokes

TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

 

[Pegi]

پاسخ : English Jokes

When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.

+!

 

[شازده کوچولو]

پاسخ : English Jokes

A very beautiful woman was walking on the roof
of a building and she fell down.
On her way falling down, an American man caught her.

She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life; I'll do ANYTHING for you...'
The man said: 'Okay then, kiss me.'

She said: 'You PIG!! NEVER!!'
So he said:'FINE!' and he dropped her down....


So she's falling and screaming... .
Suddenly a German man caught her in the air from his balcony.
She said:'Oh thank you, you saved me; I'll do anything that you ask...'
The guy said: 'Fraulein, kiss me.'
She replied: 'Oh you nasty pig!!! NEVER!'
So the man said: 'Fine!!!' and he also dropped her down again.


She's falling and thinking that it was better if she kissed one of those men and now she's going to die.
Suddenly, a man caught the woman from his balcony.
She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life, I'll kiss you!!'
The man replies: "Astaghforellah" and dropped her!!!!!!!

 

[جیران]

پاسخ : English Jokes

A very beautiful woman was walking on the roof
of a building and she fell down.
On her way falling down, an American man caught her.

She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life; I'll do ANYTHING for you...'
The man said: 'Okay then, kiss me.'

She said: 'You PIG!! NEVER!!'
So he said:'FINE!' and he dropped her down....


So she's falling and screaming... .
Suddenly a German man caught her in the air from his balcony.
She said:'Oh thank you, you saved me; I'll do anything that you ask...'
The guy said: 'Fraulein, kiss me.'
She replied: 'Oh you nasty pig!!! NEVER!'
So the man said: 'Fine!!!' and he also dropped her down again.


She's falling and thinking that it was better if she kissed one of those men and now she's going to die.
Suddenly, a man caught the woman from his balcony.
She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life, I'll kiss you!!'
The man replies: "Astaghforellah" and dropped her!!!!!!!

very good +​

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr] 3 men are given a wish each by genie. An Irish farmer, a Welshman and an Englishman. The Irishman wished for all land in Ireland to be forever fertile. In a flash its done. The Englishman is amazed. "I want a wall around all of England so no one can enter our precious land." In a flash a great wall appeared all around ...England. The Welshman said "Tell me more about this wall?" The genie tells him "Its 500ft high and 500ft thick, nothing gets in and nothing gets out." The Welshman lights up a Hamlet and smiles...."Fill the f**ker with water!"[/ltr]

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr] One man (lets call him Johnny) came to gun shop.
J(ohnny):I want a pistol
S(alesman):Choose from this wall (points at wall full of pistols)
J: (points at biggest pistol) I want this,
S: An .44 Magnum? And for what purpose?
...J: For shooting cans.
S: (points on smaller handgun) For shooting cans is the best this one.
J: (points again on .44) No, I want this one.
S: And what cans will you shoot at?
J: Um...Mexi-cans, Portori-cans, Afri-cans...[/ltr]

 

[alemzadeh]

پاسخ : English Jokes

A very beautiful woman was walking on the roof
of a building and she fell down.
On her way falling down, an American man caught her.

She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life; I'll do ANYTHING for you...'
The man said: 'Okay then, kiss me.'

She said: 'You PIG!! NEVER!!'
So he said:'FINE!' and he dropped her down....


So she's falling and screaming... .
Suddenly a German man caught her in the air from his balcony.
She said:'Oh thank you, you saved me; I'll do anything that you ask...'
The guy said: 'Fraulein, kiss me.'
She replied: 'Oh you nasty pig!!! NEVER!'
So the man said: 'Fine!!!' and he also dropped her down again.


She's falling and thinking that it was better if she kissed one of those men and now she's going to die.
Suddenly, a man caught the woman from his balcony.
She said: 'Oh thank you, you saved my life, I'll kiss you!!'
The man replies: "Astaghforellah" and dropped her!!!!!!!

very nice

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr] A man goes Golfing every Saturday, and his wife deosn't like it but she never complains. One day during Winter, the man goes to get ready for golf. He gets his clubs and gets dressed. He walks outside and the weather is horrible. He puts his clubs away, gets undressed and hops back into bed, cuddling up to his wife. He... whispers in her ear "horrible weather out there!" and she replies "I know! Can you believe my husband is out golfing in that?!" [/ltr]

 

[جیران]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr A man goes Golfing every Saturday, and his wife deosn't like it but she never complains. One day during Winter, the man goes to get ready for golf. He gets his clubs and gets dressed. He walks outside and the weather is horrible. He puts his clubs away, gets undressed and hops back into bed, cuddling up to his wife. He... whispers in her ear "horrible weather out there!" and she replies "I know! Can you believe my husband is out golfing in that?!" [/ltr]

tnx

 

[EhsanJ]

پاسخ : English Jokes

[ltr] Did you hear about Apple's new product? They wanted to make an iPod touch especially for children : they cancelled it when they realised it'd be called "iTouch kids[/ltr]